Liberal Protestants aren’t Evangelicals

Nick Kristof loves him some Evangelicals.....Wait, that's not an Evangelical?!

The New York Times‘ designated gonzo boy Nick Kristof wades out just a bit beyond his diaper threshold to scold us bad secular people for being mean to “evangelicals”. The reason why is that on many of his 24- hour-visits-under- gunfire to various third world hotspots (designed to titillate the aging hipster demographic) he encounters Christian activists who seem not to be genocidal maniacs during the brief time he shares hunkered down in their pantries. And, some old Anglican fucker died who promoted foreign missions and aid to the poor in underdeveloped nations. Notably, however, this minister was an ANGLICAN! Cambridge educated. Church of England, God and Queen and such, you know. Posner does a good job in presenting the other side of the coin regarding evangelizing the planet. However, what seems to be missing from any reasoned discussion is the extent to which the word “evangelical” should be applied to a leading figure in the Queen’s Church. He’s a fucking Anglican, for fucks sake. He’s not a fucking evangelical. He is so far removed from the Jerry Falwells and Pat Robertsons of this world that they should not be mentioned in the same chapter of a book on contemporary Christianity. He’s a liberal Protestant. Indeed, he is the epitome of a liberal Protestant and the antithesis of what we commonly identify in the United States as “evangelical.”

Sectarian Christians should be made fun of, and they should be excluded from the public sphere. Gonzo boy Kristof should go hang out in Nigeria on the fringe of Christian-Muslim-indigenous violence–and base himself among the indigenous. “Evangelical” missionaries are helping their converts, who then are encouraged to kill or convert everyone else, and wage holy war. The liberal Protestant missions, however valiant and well meaning, have paled in success when compared to the sectarian and fundamentalist missions. And, those religious nutjobs are now fueling war and genocide, as we should expect. So, yeah, if I ever have time to go to a cocktail party, I’ll continue to deride the sectarians, and to roll my eyes at the fruitless efforts of the liberals religious types.

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